Have A Nice Day
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Have A Nice Day
Tracksuits and Trashbags
Lol look at Ai glazing us
Religious fasting turns into an unexpected data dive when the guys discover Pornhub's analytics show significant drops in specific content during Ramadan. This kickstarts an exploration of cultural oddities that spans continents and decades.
Ever wondered why tracksuits became the uniform of Eastern European men? The hosts uncover the surprising status symbol behind Adidas gear in post-Soviet states, revealing how the first Western apparel company allowed behind the Iron Curtain transformed fashion into political currency. This cultural analysis provides genuine insight into how seemingly superficial fashion choices carried profound historical significance during the Cold War.
The conversation takes a conspiratorial turn with declassified information about CIA involvement in abstract expressionist art movements. From funding Jackson Pollock to developing "heart attack guns," the hosts speculate about the agency's wildest projects with a comedic lens that makes historical absurdities approachable while questioning the thin line between security operations and madness.
Personal stories from Division III football dominate the second half, featuring incompetent coaches, bizarre motivational tactics from questionable "Navy SEALs," and the unique social dynamics that develop in locker rooms. Through authentic, unfiltered anecdotes about team politics and informal "councils," the hosts unpack complex topics like belonging, race, and masculinity with surprising depth beneath their humor.
Ready for a journey through religious practices, covert operations, and athletic misadventures? Hit play and join the conversation that proves truth really is stranger than fiction. Don't forget to subscribe and share your favorite moments with us online!
I'm recording All right, clap on three, wait, no Clap. When I say go Three, two, one, clap, I said clap.
Speaker 2:When I say go, I think that that would work, though you did it on clap. Okay, ready, okay, I'll do it.
Speaker 1:All right on clap, we make a noise. Three, two, one you didn't do it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I did. I see the spike, I see the audio spike. You did it when I did it, not talking about what I didn't do. Are you sure? Yeah, dude, all right, if you're not careful, I'll end this fucking podcast and I'll go to Latin Mass. All right, will you actually?
Speaker 1:Because, whatever I got to do to make that happen, I think that's what Christ the Redeemer would want To. Because, like whatever I gotta do to make that happen, I think that's what christ the redeemer would want. On what to go to class dude, it is lent. Did you give anything up? Um, I've been doing ramadan style. I feel weird talking about what you're doing for fasting, because I was listening to the sermon on the mount and jesus basically said the. I mean, it's pretty much. This context is like the biggest thing you can do as a bitch is tell people that you're fasting when you're fasting.
Speaker 1:Um, yeah, it's not more like I think it was more like don't be like oh I'm fasting. It's so hard and literally everyone at my work is doing ramadan and all day they just like can't fucking work. They're all on reduced hours. They work 10 to 4 during Ramadan, every day you talk to them. They're like oh.
Speaker 1:I'm barely surviving. Oh, it's so hard. And so I, for Lent, decided to do I mean, because obviously we invented that type of fasting. They just stole everything from us. I, for Lent, lent, have been doing ramadan fasting, so I don't eat while the sun's up. It's the easiest shit ever, dude. It's literally just intermittent fasting and all these people are like I can't even work, it's so hard, um my favorite wrinkle of ramadan is that uh all the gay porn reduces because they can't go on devices.
Speaker 1:That is true. Maybe that's what it is is they can't masturbate.
Speaker 2:That's why they're in such bad moods, so they're just all backed up and hungry.
Speaker 1:Oh, backed up and hungry.
Speaker 2:Wait, what do you mean? The gay porn goes down. So Pornhub released this thing during Ramadan, when Muslims, I guess't use um electronics or something is that? Is that true?
Speaker 1:that. I think that's jews on saturdays.
Speaker 2:Let's see can muslims use electronics during? Ramadan that's what I call it, although it's not advised to waste too much time on your phone. So you can prioritize spiritual and religious practices during the holy month. So they can use it. But you're like supposed to. You know you're supposed to abstain.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it is it is like uh, you're what, what's it called? You're just supposed to be like a little bit more aware yeah, supposed to abstain, you're supposed to, it's supposed to be.
Speaker 2:It's like a dumb version of lent, not dumb, I didn't mean to say dumb.
Speaker 1:Our muslim brotherhood, um, but uh then let me say it for you yeah, yeah, sure it's a not real version of lent. Yeah, we add on it. We tack on an extra 10 days. They're're over there. Ooh the moon isn't full anymore.
Speaker 2:Well, all I know is that Pornhub did this research. Like the moon worshipers, pornhub did this research where, basically, the porn during Ramadan every year, the gay porn being watched watched hugely reduces with Ramadan.
Speaker 1:Oh, because there's so many closeted gay Muslim guys, cause they're all just watching porn, you know. But like, how much of that is being Muslim and how much of that is being Middle Eastern? Because, like, a lot, just the Middle Eastern guys, they're all just borderline, like even the straight ones. They all are very well manicured, they smell really nice, they're into like incense and they literally wear dresses everywhere they go I'm not even talking about the ones that are in the middle east.
Speaker 2:I'm talking about the ones that make it over here, they're all going to lounges all the time.
Speaker 1:I mean it's quite a homosexual, it's very homoerotic, it's a very homoerotic culture that they've produced, which is why, when anyone is like what was Jesus, it's pretty obvious he was Middle Eastern.
Speaker 2:All that incense, all that shirtless energy, he's getting followed by all dudes I mean, jesus is a gay middle eastern guy I think pretty obvious. I mean, you're blaspheming our lord, but I think, uh, I think why would that be blaspheming?
Speaker 2:if jesus was gay, jesus rips I think what happens is um they, they get to a place like america where, like you, can kind of ball out a little bit, and if you've just been wearing like sandals and smelling like grape leaves for your whole life, it's like it's kind of sick to fucking put on some I don't know what about saying wearing sandals and smelling like grape leaves, that's like.
Speaker 1:That's in no way insulting and is actually kind of a nice thing to say about somebody. But man coming out of your face, I just didn't like it why?
Speaker 2:well, I'm saying like there's no dracar noir over there. So like, what's the car new?
Speaker 1:ah, it's a god is that a johnny depp fragrance?
Speaker 2:you are from, just you're from. You're from a place where they don't even know what cologne is, but it's uh brother, I'm from a place where we didn't know what Ramadan was.
Speaker 1:That's for sure.
Speaker 2:Yeah, true.
Speaker 1:I'm just getting used to all this new stuff.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, honestly, me neither. But Dracar Noir is a fragrance that Albanians really like. Actually, why?
Speaker 1:would I know what Albanians like I'm going on Albanian amazon to check in what? They've got going on I don't even know where albania is. Where is albania? It's like, uh, just west of the caucasus mountains okay, so is it towards azerbaijan or towards us, towards? Us oh okay, so they're like in the uh, they're like towards, they're near Serbia and Hungary yeah. Is Serbia, the ones that has a huge Muslim population down in the.
Speaker 2:Caucasus no, no, or they were the ones that were super Christian.
Speaker 1:Serbians are super Orthodox Christian. That's a war. We never talk about the breakup of Czechoslovakia.
Speaker 2:When we just bombed Yugoslavia into hell.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so which one were we bombing? Were we bombing the Christians, or were we bombing the Muslims?
Speaker 2:I think we're doing. I think we bombed the Christians, I think I think I think we're doing both of them. I think we're just like're just trying to break up that, because what we wanted to do who were we attacking?
Speaker 1:Were we attacking tracksuits or guys in trash bags?
Speaker 2:Which one? I think both, I think. That's what I'm saying. So what I'm saying is I think so the Soviet Union collapses, and then you have these satellite states, and we didn't want any of those satellite states to band together in a block like yugoslavia did, and we wanted to so you're, so the the track suits were getting together and kind of getting along with the guys in trash bags and we saw trash bags.
Speaker 1:We'll cut two holes in a trash bag and then wear it all the way down to the length of your ankles. And then what do you got?
Speaker 2:yeah, it really is like. It's like you didn't even try fashion wise, I mean they're track suits and trash bags.
Speaker 1:I don't think it's actually that far off. So the history, the history of the bosnian war is basically uh, the guys in the track suits started wait, actually, do you know why they wore tracksuits?
Speaker 2:Do you know what that is? Do you know what it's?
Speaker 1:from. I think they saw one too many Run DMC videos. That was the only music that they could listen to was Run DMC, and so they thought that's how everybody in America dressed.
Speaker 2:No, so the first company that was allowed into the Sovietviet union that sold apparel was adidas. So so to get an adidas tracksuit back then was like the epitome of status, because it was like you had enough money to go blow it on a fucking you know. So that it's basically just like it was the status symbol for the super poor russian, you know so it tracksuits like an armani suit yeah, for the plebs for them yeah is that interesting?
Speaker 1:it's very interesting. I'm just picturing them in a because, like I, there's a part of my worldview, there's a part of the way that my brain works where I can't really picture a world in which anybody in the caucus region, or just the Soviet satellite states in general, isn't in a dirt farm, isn't farming mud. So now I'm just picturing them in a tracksuit, farming mud, and I mean that doesn't sound like the most effective way to be a farmer they're not, but those aren't like the gangsters had them.
Speaker 2:Not the fucking guy, not the guys that are doing beat farming, what the fuck?
Speaker 1:yeah, but I, I think I think that would be pretty funny. If the guy is doing the beat farming, we're wearing the tracksuits also.
Speaker 2:The guy that's making. We don't know the answer to this the guy that's making the borscht is not the guy in the tracksuit, it's the guy that's.
Speaker 1:That's what I'm saying. I'm saying like the guy making sauerkraut is like a hit. There he's, you know, laying the seed. I don't even think they have seed, I think, like over there, it's just mud. They shit in the mud, they rub it together and they see what comes out and you know, this is slavophobia, is what it is.
Speaker 2:I can hear.
Speaker 1:I can hear the slavophobia coming through my mic and I don't mean this racially insensitive, but I don't think that.
Speaker 2:I don't think anyone minds being slavophobic I think everyone like yeah, we have been doing the trope of like dumb russian for like a thousand years I'm so sick of the fucking like whatever kind of white you are, it doesn't matter, you can be ruthlessly fucking knocked down a peg because you don't deserve like I don't. Like it's weird that like there's this like white person oppression narrative but then you have like a slavic person whose like whole ancestry have has been slaves and beat farmers and you're talking about like irish, irish slavery, like anytime somebody brings up irish slavery, people get really upset yeah, like you're gonna, you're gonna attribute the same thing that, like the british did to india, to like the people that are from fucking eastern yugoslavia.
Speaker 2:That doesn't seem, that doesn't.
Speaker 1:That doesn't seem very fair well, I mean most of those people that you're talking about have no idea what yugoslavia is or what the breakup of yugoslavia looked like or the bosnian civil war. They're just like man.
Speaker 2:That's just some white people over there yeah, isn't it crazy that that all just ends up resulting in like a bunch of the most savage white dudes ever coming to the nba and just like dominating our uh, our hip hoppers?
Speaker 1:we used to our track suits versus their track suits. We used to joke about that when not Marcin Gortat, who was it? Who was the dude who wore number?
Speaker 2:seven for the Heat the Polish Hammer, that's Marcin Gortat.
Speaker 1:Who's the guy who wore number seven for the Heat White guy? Mm-hmm I don't know, not Drago, oh Goran goron dragic yeah, we used to joke about that, uh, back when we were at saint vincent, about goron dragic, as he was just sitting there fucking like literally. He's like how, what do you mean? Hit my free throws brother, on either side of me everyone throwing grenade. I used to sit there during airstrike drill and shoot the basketball into into hoop, like why would they be scared of?
Speaker 2:why would they be scared of this? That's the same thing they asked. They asked jokic like uh, it's a really loud crowd out there. Are you? Are you concerned that? And he's like brother, I play in serbia, I'm from serbia and like and then doesn't explain that.
Speaker 1:So then you're sitting there like what happened in serbia no they're just like a guy goosing him did a guy come? Up and goose you during your free throw you go look at serbia.
Speaker 2:Though you look at what's going on over there in the middle of their games, it's like, oh, they're lighting flares. Oh, it's crazy dude. Yeah, so I mean. And then you got like all of our fucking guys now.
Speaker 1:In Greek basketball they were talking to Rick Pitino and he was like I get over there for my first game. Everybody's smoking cigarettes inside. They're smoking cigarettes inside. They're all sitting on white lawn chairs. I'm like what is going on here? Everybody's got plastic white chairs, they're smoking cigarettes inside and everybody won't stop saying tzatziki sauce, they got tzatziki sauce in the water bottles.
Speaker 2:My players can't even get a sip of water.
Speaker 1:Every time they go to take a sip of water there's tzatziki sauce in there. I mean, the guys are so fucking dehydrated I can't even explain it to you. I go to the doctor. I'm like this guy's knees are shot, doc, we got to get him some shot of steroids. They shoot him up with olive oil. Who is that supposed to be?
Speaker 2:Brother I played in Greece. Was it supposed to be Rick Pitino?
Speaker 1:Yeah, that was Rick Pitino. Have you heard Rick Pitino talk?
Speaker 2:He's very New York he's got that old school New York style of talking. I mean, yeah, I just I don't know, man. I think that what happens? You should close your email. I think what happens is it's like if you take the NBA from when it was all white guys, right, and then the black dudes finally get in the league, in like the the late 70s, early 80s, and then by the mid 90s like it's an all black league, because all those black dudes are playing pickup in rucker park and they're playing real fucking physical hoops and they're playing like when they're growing up, and then those white dudes just have no chance. And then you fast forward another 20 years and those black dudes just play aau and like travel hoops and they go on trips and they're staying in hotels and pampered and there's a bunch worse and there's a bunch of serbian kids who are literally like playing basketball on an outdoor court
Speaker 1:during a live fire and there's guys on the sideline wearing track suits laying like fifty thousand dollar bets yeah, you have no free throws, our guys have no shot against those kids.
Speaker 2:Like, that's just not, you can't, you're not gonna beat those guys. Those guys are fucking.
Speaker 1:They don't feel anything you can really see it because, like, we'll be playing pickup basketball too. Um, on, like on mondays, we'll go over to you know the place where you fucking devastated your knee over here at tj on the slipperiest. I mean, dude, those courts are fucking so dangerous, so slippery. I don't think anybody in in bosnia herzegovov has had to deal with the slippery it's not only that they're hard, they're hard as fuck, it's like.
Speaker 2:It's like it's not a who can relate.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean, not me um, but the, the kids there, there's like a bunch of like 16 year olds that'll end up playing and it's they play a style of basketball that it's hard to deal with and pick up because they're just running the entire time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, non-stop running, sprinting up and down the court and then none of them go in the paint. There's just five kids along the three point line swinging it, swinging it, swinging it and then jack up a three. But they can all. They can all kind of shoot because, like back when we were kids, were kids like dude, you'd get hit with a stick if you shot a three-pointer. Like that was, you know, the the game you get you to the high elbow.
Speaker 1:Yeah, okay, okay right, exactly, okay, but still do you get my point, which is that there was like two people on the team were allowed to fucking shoot a three-pointer and then like if I, if I came out from the low block, my coach would call a timeout and fucking hit me with a steel chair. Yeah yeah, listen to you, piggy, listen Piggy, you're going to stay down there in the low block.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's Okay, I stay in the low block. It really is crazy how Steph Curry like completely changed the sport. How Steph Curry like completely changed the sport, like he he made. He made it so that, uh, everybody has to shoot threes to win. Um, because it's like, it's just, it's they also they go all these sports man, I don't know what happened, but they let the nerds in and they've become like hyper analytical and you get like this guy who's just doing math, like oh, we'll get more possessions and more shots if we just take a three every five seconds than if we run an offense and then that team somehow wins. But then you, once you get to the end, then you have to play somebody that's good, like that, that team never wins it's kind of it's the same with every sport.
Speaker 2:It's like the gimmick eventually gets fucking sniffed out.
Speaker 1:You know like well, they do that, they do that money ball thing.
Speaker 1:It's like they they started doing it in baseball, because, of course, like all things, baseball ruins it first and then that bleeds into other things, where, like, at some point, uh, you know you, you got this guy, you got brandon bean or whatever that fucking movie. You got brad pitt I don't, I don't know who it was, but brad pitt goes to to the oakland days. And uh, jonah hill is this fat autistic guy who can't make eye contact with anybody. And you know they, they put him in the meeting room and he's like I think we should draft, I think we should draft this guy and you know, like four old guys who've got like chew in and he's like shut the fuck up.
Speaker 2:You fat idiot, we're not gonna draft that guy he's batting 140.
Speaker 1:Okay, he's fucking old and his knees don't work and jonah hill's like, but he walks a lot. I was just thinking that he gets a lot of free bases. I love when people get free bases. He didn't even have to swing the bat and now he's on first base. It's so important to be able to do that. I don't know what that's from. You've never seen the movie with Brad Pitt and Jonah Hill.
Speaker 2:No, I've seen it, but I don't know why. I don't know why. Uh, like so many of the the money ball, like the analytics guys, like, how did they take over so fast? Because it's like I don't outside of the money ball.
Speaker 1:I know he got results, but it seems like it's the same thing with the combine guys. It's the same thing with the combine guys. Is the combine guys? It's all about, uh. Diffusion of responsibility no, that's the wrong term. It's all about uh, not accountability. Responsibility no, that's the wrong term. It's all about uh, not accountability. What's the fucking word that I want?
Speaker 2:like um, like analytics, like being able to track what no, being able to.
Speaker 1:Uh, it relieves responsibility. Because you, you take a look at the guy's 40 time and when the owner asks, why did you draft this guy in the first round, you go, oh well, look, dude, he ran a 438, 40. He's 250 pounds, he's six foot four. His arm length is x. You know, he's got 34 inch arms. He could bench press 225 30 times. And then the owner's like, well, that sounds like a great draft pick. And you're like, yeah, of course it was the coach's fault. The coach couldn't turn this into a good player. I got him guys with good potential. And the coach is sitting there and is like this guy can't fucking move lateral, like you know what I mean? It's like it takes away because it's so much harder to be able to watch film and be like, oh, this guy, and sniff out potential, you know, and be like, oh, this guy is going to translate to the league and it's so much easier to just be like, oh, yeah, dude, he's just big and fast and strong yeah, I get it.
Speaker 2:So it's just like being able to shirk responsibility and not get fun and you're like oh yeah, there's this thing yeah, because it's like we're doing that.
Speaker 1:We're doing that now in like. We're doing that in everything. They're doing that in baseball they're doing that in football.
Speaker 1:They're doing that now in like, we're doing that in everything. They're doing that in baseball, they're doing that in football, they're doing that in basketball. And then they start doing that in like in business. You know what I mean? It's like these guys who run BlackRock. They won't even look at there, this fucking documentary about uh people investing in the chinese companies.
Speaker 1:And they would look at the prospectus. Right, they would order a prospectus. They would be like, okay, this is how much we're producing, this is how much we're uh spending to produce that. And so then they'd be like, okay, well then, this is what the valuation is. So then all of these guys would fucking uh put a bunch of money into these chinese companies and then, at the end of the day, these companies would go out of business two years later because nobody went over to china to see what was happening. And they'd go over to china to see if these businesses even existed, and they'd be fake businesses. They wouldn't even. It would just be like a chinese guy writing a prospectus in a closet and being like, yeah, dude, I've got a paper mill, and he's just like he's got like a stack of computer paper behind him. They do a Zoom call and he's like look at all this paper that I made.
Speaker 2:He's doing it all by hand. I mean, so is this basically like a trust the experts kind of a thing, do you think so?
Speaker 1:is this basically like a trust the experts kind of a thing you think? I think it's a. I think you're diving into the fake reality. Okay, I think from a sports perspective, it's not trust the experts, it's that there is no experts anymore, so you don't have any real taste.
Speaker 2:It's like the same way where, like yeah, but how are you going to say that to Greg Popovich? There's obviously experts. Well, he doesn't do that?
Speaker 1:Well, he doesn't do that, and that's why they're successful over the long haul. But then you get these.
Speaker 1:You get so like that's harder to do, it's so much harder to be a Krzyzewski, a Bill Belichick, a Greg Popovich, but it's easy to be a guy who's like, oh yeah, dude, look at his combine numbers, let's just draft based off of that. You know what I mean. It's like when you see somebody throw for 4,000 yards, like Shador Sanders, he's like, oh, he threw for 4,000 yards, it threw for 4 000 yards. It's like, well, turn on the tape, bro.
Speaker 2:This guy sucks.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he put up great numbers against ball state yeah, but so then it's like it's not even a trust. The experts, it's that there is no experts. You know what I mean, because it's so much harder to build expert class.
Speaker 1:It's like judging a painting based off of how much uh money somebody's willing to pay for it, rather than whether or not it's actually aesthetically beautiful yeah, I mean, that happens a lot, dude yeah, you look at modern art and you're like this jackson pollock painting's fucking 60 million dollars, so it must be beautiful and it's like but dude that shit to me, bro, that all literally just feels like embezzlement and fraud and like tax evasion is, is what the the modern art scene is. Yeah, I used a bad example because Jackson Pollock was literally. They used Jackson Pollock paintings as a CIA front as a way to embezzle money.
Speaker 2:I mean I could do every single one of Jackson Pollock's paintings.
Speaker 1:Let me look up Jackson Pollock paintings CIA. It literally looks like me and you just had a During the Cold War, the CIA funded and supported abstract expressionalist art, including pollock, as a part of a broader effort to promote american culture how fucking insane is that dude?
Speaker 1:the key figure in the strategy was the cia's congress for cultural freedom, which organized art exhibitions and supported artists to showcase their creativity and individualism. Associated with the west, do you? However, the cia did indirectly support pollock and other artists through organizations and exhibitions. Okay, so they were just like they were buying the paintings and then building um art galleries to put like expressionist abstract art in there as a way. Uh, and then when they would sell those paintings, the cia would like have a hand in that, uh, that painting getting sold, so that they could then use that to like fund the iran contra to go bong yugoslavia yeah, yeah, exactly to be like well, this is our black money.
Speaker 1:You're not allowed to see this.
Speaker 2:I just don't understand how I mean. Yesterday I was watching Tucker Carlson. How funny is that bro?
Speaker 1:Imagine being the guy who's sitting there like oh, my paintings are finally taking off.
Speaker 2:People are finally noticing how talented I am.
Speaker 1:It's just some guy at the CIA coked out of of his mind. He's just given an elephant lsd and he sees your shit art and he's just like it's just some fucking yale guy. It's literally prescott bush, who's fucking just killed an elephant on acid. He's high as shit on cocaine. He sees your fucking shit artwork and he's just like, ah, if we can make the russians think this shit is good, we can literally make them kill themselves dude, there was definitely an era of fucking cia boardroom meetings where they were coming up with ideas.
Speaker 2:That is better than like literally any snl writers room, any, any, any like yeah any comedy like environment falls so short to what the CIA was talking about in boardrooms in the late 80s.
Speaker 1:You just have unlimited funds.
Speaker 2:You have unlimited funds and you have guys that don't have access to the internet and probably in a lot of spaces don't have that much context about things, so they're just like what if we make a heart attack gun?
Speaker 1:and it's like, yeah, yeah, what is that?
Speaker 2:tom, and you're like we just take, like fucking uh, puffer fish extract and we put it in a little syringe and we shoot it at someone's fucking neck.
Speaker 1:It's like, why would we do that? Why would we just shoot that guy?
Speaker 2:and they're like, no, no, no, it needs to look like an accident. Well, wouldn't the dart be in his neck? Like wouldn't, yeah, just shoot that guy. And they're like, no, no, no, it needs to look like an accident. Well, wouldn't the dart be in his neck? Yeah, yeah, but no one's going to look into that. Talk about and you already said it, but they were all doing blow. The thing I feel like a lot of Americans don't understand is there's like an era from 1975 to 1990 where everyone is high on cocaine.
Speaker 1:The teachers in class for fifth grade are high on cocaine, yeah, and you can tell how much cocaine like here's how you know it was the cia or here's how you know the cia was on cocaine is. At first they were just bringing a little bit into like, okay, the cia is the one, bring it. It's like that fucking what's that wesley snipe movie where he's like uh, the the? He's like. He's like black people don't own a helicopter. He's like ain't no poppy fields in harlem you know what I mean.
Speaker 2:It's talking about blade no, it's not blade.
Speaker 1:Okay, wesley snipe does not say that in blades but no he just he goes into the.
Speaker 1:This whole thing about he was like there's no coco fields in fucking new york and so he's just like how, how are they getting cocaine into the country? It's the cia, but it's such a like they start off by bringing just a little bit of cocaine in, right like they're. They're bringing in like small packets that they'll sneak on to an airplane and, like anybody with a bad coke habit, within like three years it's Barry Seal flying planes that are just fully filled with cocaine, throwing it out over Mina Arkansas. Just like fucking so much cocaine.
Speaker 1:You know, what I mean. It's just like. It's like well, why don't I just buy, like all of the coke? Why are we bringing so little coke into the place?
Speaker 2:I hadn't, I hadn't thought about it like that. But it's so true that cocaine for like just what it is and how addictive it is and everything like if you were only bringing in a little bit at a time after you got a few rich guys to do some it, the demand spike would be so intense. Yep, you're like where is it? Like no one knew what it was before and you got a bunch of new york finance bros to fucking take a break from their job and go have fucking. You know old fashions and do blow and and who do you think those finance bros hang out with that's.
Speaker 1:That's the thing that like people don't understand is, like those new york finance bros, like everybody thinks it's this big conspiracy. But those new york finance bros, when you look into like the old love, like when, when, the when, like the oss in the in the beginning of the cia right, all of the guys who started it, like alan bellis, were finance lawyers and finance guys from new york. They were working for like Brown Brothers, harriman and these like old Yankee banks that had been up there in the Connecticut, greenwich, connecticut, for fuck it or whatever Greenwich, however, the fuck you say it. They've been up there in Connecticut for like a hundred years, right. And then those guys are the perfect people to recruit to being in your spy agency because they're already traveling over to meet with the fucking German chancellor, because they need to find out how many cars Volvo is going to produce next week, so they're already traveling everywhere. And then a guy comes up to you and he's like, hey, by the way, while you're over in germany.
Speaker 1:Do you think you could use this heart attack gun for me? We just made this, we just made this last week. Uh, I want you to. I want you to shoot the chancellor with this fucking heart attack gun because the guy's like, aren't they just gonna see the dart?
Speaker 2:and he's like, don't worry about that yeah.
Speaker 1:So I mean like there's this huge conflagration I don't know if that's the right word, it might be a conglomeration there's this huge uh network of like new york lawyers who went to yale and harvard with like cia spies who also went to yale and harvard and are all like living around each other. They're all old money and know each other like the fucking old cia used to just be all it'd be like the second son, like the same way of the equivalent of when you were a royal back in the day your first son would inherit the throne and the second son would have to like go into the priesthood or into the military. That's like what you would do, like your first son would go into finance and your second son would go into the cia yeah, I mean, what a shitty what you were just saying.
Speaker 2:What a shitty gig to be the son that has to go become a priest. I'd be oh yeah, back in the day, I'd be so angry if that was, yeah, and my brother got to, like you know, go to the crusades or something or got to fucking, you know, even be a blacksmith and I'm just in the fucking church, like in the name of the father and the spirit, and then not even that, like I can't even have a wife. Well, I probably could have a wife back then.
Speaker 1:No, you had wife back then. Yeah, but that's why they had to stop. It was because you would get a wife. You'd be the second son, you have all this church land and then you'd be like, why don't I just take my brother's land? This is fucking bullshit.
Speaker 2:They got to bring that back. They got to bring back the priest being able to have wives.
Speaker 1:I thought you were going to say, like wars between the church and the state, and I was going to say, yeah, I'm with you.
Speaker 2:I mean that too. Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 1:No priests got to. Yeah, now that we've moved on from that, we do have to have priests having wives.
Speaker 2:It's crazy that they can't have wives.
Speaker 1:I mean literally the entire priesthood is gay guys Like I mean there is just not one straight. There's like. I've met two straight priests my entire life and all of them have been. Both of them have been kicked out of the priesthood because they started like fucking one of the moms in the church. It's like dude no it's an unreasonable, it's impossible.
Speaker 2:It's unreasonably low-T too, like crazy low-T in there. I've never met a priest like remember, like it's either like crazy low T in there. I've never met a pre. Like remember, like it's either like a like a low T gay guy or it's like someone who was like a vicious alcoholic.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it was like I, father Max, who used to come to the football games and talk to us before the dude. He would give us speeches for the listeners. He would give us speeches before our football games, where he'd be like you guys are about to go to battle tomorrow and one thing, one battle that you can, you can never. You got you gotta stop. You can't stop fighting. You can't stop fighting because the problem with battles is, one day you're going to find yourself in the back of an alleyway. You're going to. You're going to have some guy you just met last week.
Speaker 1:He's gonna be neck deep inside of you and, and you're gonna come out you're gonna come out of your blackout and there's just gonna be a, a ball sack hitting the bottom of your chin over and over again as you're kneeling in a puddle of your own puke. And when you wake up out of that, that's when you're gonna know what a real fight is right. So if you, if you give up when you're playing against westminster, you're going to give up in that moment too. Okay, you don't want to give up in that moment, because when you come to and that fucking dead bag of balls is just hitting your chin and this guy that you just met you don't even know who this guy is and he's just ah, he's moaning you're gonna have to, you're gonna have to get that guy out of your neck deep and fucking kick his ass, right, because you're not gay and you're like what the fuck?
Speaker 2:are you?
Speaker 1:talking about bro. He would give the darkest speeches. Dude, he'd give the darkest speeches we had.
Speaker 2:We had some people that had no business talking to us. Remember that guy they brought in that was like. He was like a former navy seal, supposedly uh-huh, but but he did not give the vibe at all. No, he just became a coach for a week yeah, and he like made us do Indian runs and like he made me carry Darius McGee he made me carry our starting left tackle.
Speaker 1:He's like who's the quarterback? And I was just like kind of talking shit in the front line. He's like oh all right, all right, he's like, you know, a quarterback. They got to be willing to do anything for their team and I'm like, okay, and he's like well, so this offensive lineman. He's like who's our left tackle and you know our six foot six 280 pound left tackle's like that's me and he's like he's okay, so he does all that for you. He's always protecting you. Are you willing to protect him?
Speaker 2:And I'm like.
Speaker 1:I don't think he needs any protection. He's gigantic. There's a reason. It goes one way and he's like you, carry him. Carry him from one side of the field to the other and I had to carry Dus mcgee on my back and darius's fucking dong is hanging halfway between my fucking shoulder blades I got him in a fireman's carry and I can feel darius mcgee's fucking schlong on my back like I. Like I've got a genuine broadsword in my scabbard.
Speaker 1:It would have been so funny if you hurt yourself, like busted a hip and then dropped him and then he tore his shoulder and then that guy just had to be like all right, that guy turns in his toe shoes.
Speaker 2:As soon as it happens, he goes and turns and sprints to his Hummer.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's right, he parked the Hummer right on our fucking field. It was weird playing Waynesburg and he showed up in a Hummer and he parked the Hummer where the ambulance was supposed to be and they couldn't get the ambulance onto the field.
Speaker 2:He was blocking the emergency entrance for the ambulance and somebody got hurt and I remember he no, that was when, I think, joey died of um he had, he has like the sickle cell thing uh well, he didn't have sickle cell, he had poor circulation well, I think that you know why I thought that he did okay yeah, I think that you know why I thought that Joey had sickle cell. Well, why don't you tell me what I think? I mean? It seems pretty obvious.
Speaker 1:I don't think Joey had sickle cell. I think Joey, from what I remember, joey had poor circulation and then didn't drink any water and tried to do a fitness test at 6 am, but no, that was a different time. Waynesburg, he fucking the Navy SEAL parked his Hummer in front of the ambulance and they had to go on to the loudspeaker. And they were like can whatever dumbass who parked their fucking stupid H2 in front of the fucking ambulance entrance can they move that?
Speaker 2:And you just? I just just know, I never saw him again. That was the last time I saw him, I think he was so embarrassed he just drove home from there you know what you know. What gets me too is how, um I know for a fact they found that guy on craigslist like they didn't even they didn't, they didn't know that guy, that guy was just, they just turned that guy loose.
Speaker 2:We're paying a. They just turned that guy loose. We're paying a lot of money that team is. That's the other thing that team was getting so much. Remember we raised all that money one time and they just spent it all on like new coaching gear.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They got a huge donation, and I mean DP even called it out. They got a huge donation and we were like, oh, that's fucking sick dude. Like we, we got this big donation and we showed up and they bought like 10 new pullovers for all of the coaches, like all these matching sets. They got all these matching sets, these cool matching sets for their fucking you. You know, they got cool new hats, new visors.
Speaker 2:Fuck them.
Speaker 1:And we got none of it. But Bob did give me and Dave all of that shit. So I actually do have a bunch of it, because Bob took me out for dinner after he got fired and he gave me a bunch of those matching sets. I still wear them every now and then I didn't get anything.
Speaker 1:It was crazy. Dp, the fucking athletic director, who was the basketball coach at the time, was just like you guys got a fucking donation and all these coaches bought themselves new shit. He's like how about some backpacks for the players? What the fuck.
Speaker 2:Dude, how about we have another color pair of game pants? Yeah, yeah, we were the only team in the fucking conference with one colored pair of game pants yeah, I feel bad.
Speaker 1:We got a real coaching staff after you left and it was fucking awesome I know you love talking about that yeah, it was really cool. I mean we were like a way worse football team, but we did so much better because we had real coaches. It was yeah, it's.
Speaker 2:I mean, we don't have to harp on this. It is sad, though, how, um how football dependent coaching is, and how little people know about that oh, I mean like where, where you end up and what your system is.
Speaker 1:I mean changes literally everything. I went from like fucking everybody thought I was a big dumb retard to having a fucking great season because everybody was just like wide open. Suddenly and I actually knew who was supposed to get the ball and I was like, well, this makes sense even just I remember, like not running after practices yeah, oh, dude, that was in. We were the least well-conditioned team possible, and then every third we would just fall apart.
Speaker 2:I remember thinking like man, every single football team I've ever played on since I've been fucking five years old, we run after practice.
Speaker 1:Like you run gassers. That's how you end the practice. Why?
Speaker 2:don't we run.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And like do you think we didn't run?
Speaker 1:your senior year, we ran every single. We ran after every the.
Speaker 2:When we had the real coaching stuff, we ran after every single practice do you think we didn't run just because they were like, yeah, I don't want to stay longer.
Speaker 1:Like I remember the argument being like you're supposed to get conditioning while you're in practice. Which said I mean it's football. It said no one ever.
Speaker 2:Yeah I mean, that's god. That's not how conditioning works. It's remarkable how I mean not to turn this podcast into just a tirade against our coaching staff, but like that, that, that is.
Speaker 1:I think the people are interested in what happens during division three football it.
Speaker 2:Well, it's just so bizarre that, like you could have people that are professionals quote, unquote. And well, that guy won a national championship in like 1918. Yeah.
Speaker 1:No, I mean he won a national championship in the year 2000. Like I mean, that's kind of that's kind of funny that like he was like the last team to beat Mount Union. Like when we went over there you know what I mean. It was like it had been 10 years of like mount union winning national championships and they were like the last team. That wasn't at bridgewater.
Speaker 1:He did that, yeah, bridgewater. They were like the last team that wasn't uh, either mount union or john carroll to win a national championship, or wisconsin whitewater, I think it was so 20 years ago it was like what bob was probably what like 85. So yeah, yeah, yeah. So he probably had to talk shit, because I feel like bob's not doing great right now yeah, because he's 322 years old.
Speaker 2:Like what do you mean?
Speaker 1:you know, he kind of had a hot wife no one gets to live forever. No, I just remember, did you go over to his house and they made the cornish hens? Did you get to do that?
Speaker 2:yeah, I went over the house and they made the Cornish hens. Did you get to do that? Yeah, I went over to the house and I said retard and I got in a bunch of trouble. Why did you say retard? Because we were playing like cornhole or something. And then someone was trying to change the cornhole game and say like okay, now this time we got to like throw it over our heads backwards and I was like that's fucking retarded. And I was standing right next to his brother, who apparently has a retarded kid.
Speaker 1:What do you mean? Apparently, he came to like every practice.
Speaker 2:I never noticed.
Speaker 1:And the kid wasn't retarded. He had Down syndrome.
Speaker 2:Okay, so I don't know why let's get out the finest knife we have and split those hairs. Um, I mean, well, what do we if? If okay, so that's just okay. Um, we can move on. Or I can say what I think here and I don't know what's the path. Okay, because if we're going to not umbrella the Ah, shit the DS. If we're not going to Nintendo DS.
Speaker 1:Well, it's like this. It's not everybody in that family of the coaching staff. Not every one of our coaches had DS, but every one of our coaches was retarded. So, like it's kind of one of those, you know it's like a bit of an SAT question.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's. Yeah, I mean, I heard that they fired our boy Spatanka, and they replaced him with, like the local high school's fucking coach or something. Is that true? Hello? Is this thing on?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm just thinking. I was just listening to you click in the background.
Speaker 2:Click.
Speaker 1:You're clicking, um, yeah, smitanki's, um, poor guy getting fired, does that? I mean I? I hope the audience understands how important st vincent college football is. I mean because once you're a bearcat, you're a bearcat for the rest of your life. But I mean just, I like there, there is a level, especially as soon as you become a head coach, because I think smithake is a great guy, but there's a level where you have to be able to go into, uh, a young man's home and meet his parents and convince them to send their kid up to your school and that you're going to take good care of them and trust me how to be an adult.
Speaker 1:Yeah, trust me, I got this and I just can't imagine somebody less qualified. Did somebody just go to them like, hey, I just yeah, if you can you give me your kid?
Speaker 2:I just you know why is he michael jackson?
Speaker 1:I don't know man, I remember, but he was, he was really funny. I mean, he just he had a. He had a high-pitched voice, which was hilarious for such a jacked guy. But I remember we had this one, like some of the kids that you met playing division three football, it wasn't even like it was confusing that, it wasn't just like that they played football. You just couldn't believe that they existed.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean? You were just yeah, yeah, I mean not. How are you alive?
Speaker 1:yeah, not only did you define all, defy all the odds by playing college football and being here. You defy the odds just by arriving to the right place on time in the right world, like who raised you like I mean, I don't even know how you arrived here.
Speaker 2:I think he might have graduated the year you got there, or the year before, rather, but his name was Chuck and he wore those arm sleeves that are like padded arm sleeves, that go all the way up to your elbow and down your hand, the ones you would wear when you were in third grade. Yeah, and they wore them in 1975. And he never played a single down, but he was always the first guy to every practice and he didn't even really speak english it was more of this like.
Speaker 2:Here is what it sounded like when he talked uh-huh and I never saw him play one snap in practice. I never saw him play one snap in a game and at the end of every practice he'd be like I'm going to Sharky's and I'm going to get a beer, and I never saw him in a film room. I never I that kid may have just been like he might've just brought his own pads.
Speaker 2:And then, like made a custom practice Jersey and just been out there with us, the coaching staff was so bad that they were like whatever, just let him stay like it's crazy how possible that would be.
Speaker 1:You know, if you're out there listening to this, you can just show up to a division three football practice and you could play and just start talking to kids, but don't even say anything, just be like yeah because we were in a good conference.
Speaker 1:I mean there was like four top 25 teams out there. There's like it was a legit football over there. You know what I mean you'd get a lot of kids who were like d1 transfers. But there's some shit out in like missouri, like there's no good division three football outside of ohio and pennsylvania and virginia that's where yeah the division three football is dog shit in texas, no, that's oh wait, they have mary harden baylor you're right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they have mcmurray. They have a few really good schools okay, you're right, you're right, you're right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, pretty much anywhere, except for florida, oddly pretty much anywhere where there's florida doesn't do d3 schools, period. They, they do JUCOs, yeah, they do JUCOs. So, yeah, if you don't have a good JUCO program, I guess maybe that's why okay, I was going to talk shit about out West, but that's why, nevermind, that's why they have bad division three is because they that's where all the JUCOs are. They're all out in, like Arizona and California.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay, never mind. Okay, but you could still go to a Division III practice in Arizona or a JUCO practice and you could just show up and start running onto the field as long as you somehow procured a uniform. And you could get a couple reps.
Speaker 2:Like no one would notice. That is a really good bit.
Speaker 1:No one would notice. You could get a rep or two in before anyone said anything to you.
Speaker 2:And then, when they finally find you out and ask you to leave you, just fucking pull your pants down, bare ass, and spray dookie right on the field do you remember when palumbo used to just walk around with his dick? Out, just his dick out a fucking micro penis dude, you could just walk around and put it right like right next to you like right if you were on a knee.
Speaker 2:If you were on a knee and palumbo walked up next to you and you heard his voice, I just remember being like I can't make any sudden movements. I have to slowly stand and back away from this person like it was a fucking, like it was a panther that had just walked up next to me. Dude, he used to straight as an arrow.
Speaker 1:Guy got so much pussy. I mean he loved it. I love that kid.
Speaker 2:He made every practice so fun for me. He he used to fucking. He was right next to me in the locker room we were side-by-side lockers and he would walk up to freshmen in the locker room and put his foot like on the bench next to him and then put both of his hands on his hips and like lead his hips in and out in this person's face with no, and the freshmen would be so fucking like kind of scared and shy that he wouldn't even say anything and plumb will be like he's just having a chat with you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he'd be like so where are you?
Speaker 2:from you looked really good out there today and he's like it's like dude about this coach brett character.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean, uh, and he's just got cock out while he's asking you questions. Ah, shit, yeah, I mean hey, get off email.
Speaker 2:This is going well. I know I just yeah, I mean it's pretty freaking funny.
Speaker 1:All right, let's rally for five minutes and end this thing strong.
Speaker 2:It is hilarious, though, that you have that makeup of people where it's just like. I mean, I still remember freaking your boy, pat Sims, just screaming the N-word at the top of his lungs at a black kid for not your boy and then follow it up with guys screaming the n-word, because like they okay.
Speaker 1:Pat sims was from woodbridge, virginia, which is where you're from right. Yeah, no doubt we're from like three streets away from each other, but I mean yeah affectionately referred to as hoodbridge, you know, and so it's a, it's, a little bit it's. You know, there are white kids who when they say it, you're like you probably could say it, and I remember after he fucking we had this kid not touch the line, yeah that's what it was yeah, he didn't touch the line.
Speaker 1:Michael page was running and didn't touch the line. And he comes fucking running down and we got to run another sprint because he didn't touch the line. And he comes fucking running down. And we got to run another sprint because he didn't touch the line and pat sims at the top of his lungs. It was like touch the line, beep. And everyone was just like what the fuck and dude? You remember when, like, somebody would get a nerd cry where they would just start to like like freaking?
Speaker 1:yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, like when you would the max anger cry cards yeah yeah, you cry, yeah, yeah, yeah and he fucking just immediately fought pat sims and pat sims whoops his fucking ass. And then they had a team meeting where they brought in like the council I called it the uh, the black panther council because they brought in like they brought in like wakanda and and and they had to have our white coaches had to have a meeting with our like top black players about like what to do about it. And then you know, obviously they all referred to aj, they all deferred to to aj that is crazy, that that the black community had the white.
Speaker 2:The white community doesn't have that. Like we would have if, if this happened in reverse with the white guys on our team, there would have been I don't think there would have been like a consensus. It would have been like half the room would be kind of split, you know like 60 40 or whatever.
Speaker 1:They got all of the players from miami who were like. None of them were mouthpieces. They would all wear golds during the games hey, stop. Okay, that's not true did they, you saw, aj put a mouthpiece in one game yeah, he wore the mouthpiece, wore the same past my mouthpiece.
Speaker 2:I wore we were.
Speaker 1:We were pacifiers okay, so aj had golds in. Uh, fucking, carl june had golds in and they brought them all in to have like a meeting and fucking. At the end of it, aj comes.
Speaker 2:It was like almost like the Vatican when they're choosing a new priest and you see like great smoke or black smoke at the end of it.
Speaker 1:I remember all of us sitting in the locker room waiting to find out like what the determinant was gonna be, because, like as much as everyone hated Pat Sims, I fucking grew up with him. His brother worked for my dad. My brother worked for his dad. My brother worked for paul sims, which talk about like a motherfucker of a boss dude.
Speaker 1:I remember yeah my one time my brother showed up late and they were supposed to all be driving out to a job that was like 15 miles away and paul sims made my brother take like this machine that they had to drive. It was like this, like tiny little backhoe that went like seven miles an hour. He made him drive that out to the job so it took him like two and a half hours to get this little fucking backhoe out to the job.
Speaker 1:So these are the type of people we're talking about and fucking aj comes in and, like everyone, like a hush fell over the locker room and AJ goes. Man, I just feel like if anybody could say it, pat could probably say it and everyone was like he can stay, he can stay, he's like.
Speaker 2:He's like that fat motherfucker should have touched the line.
Speaker 1:Rejoice that fat motherfucker should have touched the line oh shit yeah and everybody turned and like looked at michael page and they were like, yes, shame, shame touch the line.
Speaker 2:It is wild when, when you think about that, michael never recovered from that like no, he dropped out very shortly after he never.
Speaker 1:He never played again like it's and he was like a good blocking tight end yeah, he's a solid player, but like and there was something about it, dude where.
Speaker 1:And then he started getting in fights during um. He started getting in fights during intramural basketball and, like bro, I mean I tell me if you remember it like this, but this is how I remember it he was getting in fights with because my, my roommate freshman year was this kid don l or no, that was his roommate, this kid oh yeah, who was remember donnell jack dude? Yes, who used to fucking thump, but like didn't give a fuck about football, but would absolutely blow your head off coming through the bad.
Speaker 1:Bad at football, though, yeah bad at football, but hit hard and donnell was his roommate and uh they, they were across from us and I remember talking to donnell and uh they, we were playing intramural basketball. Donnell was on my team and donnell fucking fought him during, like, during an intramural basketball game, because it was like as if, like it was like a dog had showed his belly where, like, they were like you should have whooped pat sims ass for that. And then the fact that he didn't they like.
Speaker 2:Slowly everyone turned on him like everyone started fighting him during practices, fighting him during intramural basketball I remember, I remember him, I remember after that moment, uh, him like just kind of fading into obscurity. I don't think I ever really heard about him again and I would see him like in the school, like once a month or something somewhere, and I would just be like what happened to that guy? And then like I I guess I never put together that the council had- voted him out.
Speaker 1:They showed black smoke at the at the council they totally voted out. That's exactly what happened and he started dating a white girl that lived up here and then he dropped out of school, moved back to new jersey and he would drive back like once a month to see her and everybody would be like so what are you doing? And he'd just be like I'm just visiting and you're like oh, that's the fate of someone whose whose peoples leave them behind.
Speaker 1:What a sad reality, wow what is the equivalent, what's the white equivalent of getting voted out of? Is that just survivor, survivor? Island when you get voted out of survivor and then you have to start doing porn.
Speaker 2:It's like, that's what happened.
Speaker 1:That sounds like a bad survivor episode is like a guy is on survivor. He ends up like, uh, he ends up like getting like a scorpion in his pants. It stings his balls. He has to drop out and he loses, uh. And then you're like every now and then once a month you'll be like, oh yeah, that guy's still alive. And then he'd be doing like porn. And then he starts doing stand-up comedy and then like he blows his brains out in a holiday inn.
Speaker 2:I think the white guy equivalent is when you go like full, like white knight cuck for chicks.
Speaker 1:And you're like I can feel the darkness here. That's how I know this is real. The darkness has just settled over me.
Speaker 2:The black guys will vote you off the island for that. But the white guys will vote you off the island for when you talk shit about one of your buddies to try to get some shit, to try to get some pussy To hang out with you.
Speaker 1:It's your buddy's girlfriend and you guys all go golfing together or whatever, and then your, your buddy, is cheating on his girlfriend yeah, and you tell the girlfriend and you're like I just don't know why you let him treat you like this this is how you get voted off, you know do you know how like terrible he is to you?
Speaker 1:you deserve so much better. It was me, I would treat you like a queen, I would treat you like a princess. And then she shows all those text messages to her boyfriend who's your friend. And then that guy's like what the fuck is this? And then that guy is just out of the friend group and the only time you see him is like four years later. He is like four years later. He is like molests, like a he gets caught he gets caught having sex with like a 16 year old.
Speaker 2:That yeah, his girlfriend's 10 years younger.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, but like technically it's legal in the state and so he's like it's. She's really mature for her age.
Speaker 2:Wow.
Speaker 1:What a dark world.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it is a dark world. A lot of NFL movement going on, though, so that's going to hold me over for a few days at least.
Speaker 1:Hell yeah, well, black helicopters.
Speaker 2:Black helicopters. Let me give you a little. Oh wait, hold little. Oh wait, hold on. Oh my God, wow, I can't do it anymore.
Speaker 1:I'm out of practice. Come on get into it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I almost did. Yeah, I'll get it back. I'll get it back. That was it.
Speaker 1:Keep going, keep going, that was it Keep going, Keep going.
Speaker 2:That's good. Who's getting sacrificed? All right Well. I can't even come close to that Everybody get out there, go have yourself a nice day. Everybody get out there, go have yourself a nice day.
Speaker 1:I think, if I keep doing this voice, then at some point I'll also be able to do the Mongolian thing If he tried that, go ahead.
Speaker 2:If he tried that, it might kill him.
Speaker 1:If RFK Jr tried to do Mongolian throat singing, it might kill him. It might just haul.
Speaker 2:it might kill him If he tried to do Mongolian.
Speaker 1:if RFK Jr tried to do Mongolian throat singing.
Speaker 2:It might kill him. It might just haul off and kill him.
Speaker 1:It might fix his voice. You imagine, like RFK trying like hold on one second. Cheryl and I have been going to see these great Zen Buddhist monks out here in Santa Monica and I've been practicing my Mongolian throat singing and he goes to sing and he's just like, all of a sudden his voice sounds like men, men, men men, men, men, men, men, men men he just tries to do the Mongolian, and now he can talk normal dude, he would have fucking uh, what's it called?
Speaker 2:he would be so immensely popular if he did get his voice fixed.
Speaker 1:He should do ASMR. Just listen to him describing cutting mangoes or some shit that shit would fucking slap.
Speaker 2:Alright, dude, I gotta run, so do I.
Speaker 1:This was fun, say black helicopters. So we can black helicopters.
Speaker 2:See you guys later later.